Thursday, October 31, 2013

Once Upon a Time...

I'm going to tell you a love story. It's not a very happy love story, nor is it a very good story... Regardless, I need to get it out there.

Once upon a time a naive boy decided to go against everything he knew to be correct and moved away from his sheltered life at his parent's abode. It was time to start anew, but it wasn't easy going against his parent's wishes. They yelled and fought to keep him there, but in the boy's heart he knew that he must go. Onward the movement commenced and the boy found himself in an apartment with his two friends. The boy had one major problem though--now that he was cut off from his protective parents he had no income. But the boy trusted his heart and moved forward, hoping for the best. A few weeks later, a call was received from the great structure known as a movie theater. 
The interviews went swimmingly. The boy's charm and annoyance of dirty socks paved his way into becoming a popcorn slave. All went well for the boy as he learned the things that were required. He finally seemed to have a sense of belonging and even got a nice little gift card for being a hard working popcorn slave during the holidays of snow. 
Not but a few weeks later, came a mysterious girl. This girl had worked as a popcorn slave before, but went away to try other means of surviving. Those means didn't work out too well and so now the girl was back. All the slave drivers were abuzz with stories of this maiden's attitude and determination. Of course the boy didn't care much about a person that he has never met, but then he got a glance at her. The girl was beautiful. Long brown hair, cut with swooshy bangs that covered her right eye just ever so slightly. She was fit, but not fragile looking and she had an "I will cut you" attitude to go a long with it. The boy had no chance. Or so he thought.
Twas a Thursday night when his chance finally came. There was a long space of time between the shows that played at midnight and he, at last, spoke to the beautiful princess. They conversed about many things, but the thing most on his mind was a time when a friend had turned against him and his heart was broken. As he was talking to her, the boy's cracked heart seemed to be healing once again. After a few conversations the boy asked the girl if she would like to join him for a movie. She refused him many-a-times, but he was a patient and persistent boy. Finally she agreed and a date was set.
A classic date with a dinner at an Italian restaurant and a movie. Our server was a very jolly man and as he conversed with the girl, the boy couldn't help but smile at the way she talked. She also scored us free dessert which wasn't too good, but it was free so we didn't mind much. They talked a long while and still had plenty of time before the movie started so they went to a pond at a park. They walked around the pond and continue to converse with one another, never a break in the words being exchanged. The boy hadn't ever experienced something so mysterious before. How could this girl who he barely knew anything about, seem like one of his best friends?

Eventually, they made their way to their movie. One she had apparently seen, but had not told the boy that she had... There was then more talking as they sat in her car in the parking lot of his apartment. The boy never wanted to leave. He was happy. Although, he knew that he had to depart. The next day was once again Thursday. That wonderful day of the week. They again planned a meeting. One on upcoming Saturday. They deemed it "Salsa Saturday" for they decided to make salsa.
The boy was nervous, their second time hanging out together and he was already making an appearance at her house. Thankfully he had a fellow coworker with him, but not 10 minutes into salsa making the coworker fled to go dancing leaving the two alone once again. They had a good time making salsa though, and the boy couldn't believe how well the two of them worked together. It was late into the night when the two finished, but again they didn't want to separate from each other's sides. The girl suggested going to some of her most favorite places. The spots that she had sat alone to think about the world. The places she only had trusted to herself. They soon arrived at a dock on a lake. Now the boy had always lived one side of the lake and had never seen it from the other, but there it was. A gorgeous scene indeed. It was slightly windy that night and the maiden's hair flowed so gracefully in the wind. The boy was in awe as he looked over at the perfect girl sitting next to him. The two didn't talk much on that dock, but to the boy it was one of the greatest moments that he had ever experienced.
The boy spent the next few days replaying that memory in his mind. Imaging the girl's hair dancing through the air, her subtle smile, the way the moon glittered in her stormy gray eyes. He would try to sketch the scene, but could not capture the true beauty at the moment. He wondered whether she had felt the same way...
From then on they spent every Wednesday evening together. The boy would meet her at a little cafe table outside of an ice cream shop. There was never a moment he didn't think she was beautiful. A song became their story. They watched many movies, and visited the lake time and time again; the moments only seemed to get better. Eventually the slave drivers caught on and supported the blossoming love. They would schedule the two to work together and soon their lives fell together in harmony.
After sometime the two finally admitted their feelings to one another at the side of the lake. They were happy that they were together. The boy couldn't believe that the girl of his dreams was at last being held in his arms. They had a joyful time together and their love grew throughout the summer. As a final huzzah, they went on a camping trip where they spent three wonderful days full of laughing and of seeing beautiful sites together. It seemed as though their love would last forever. 
Soon the month of treats and scares came into season and the two were approaching their sixth full moon together. The boy planned a great date with dancing, Chinese food, and bowling. He was so glad that the girl had been his for six beautiful months. And as she got up to bowl a joyful song played through the alley. He imagined spending the rest of his life with his princess. He was happy even though he could feel a storm on the horizon.
Not but a few weeks had gone by, when the girl started behaving strangely. She became avoidant and distant. The boy was confused. Lost in what he thought was perfection, he was unable to see the reality of the truth. The girl had made a list of things that the boy had been doing that had driven her crazy. She was thinking of breaking up with him because of these flaws, but he convinced her otherwise. The boy was hurt though... He wanted to fulfill the wishes of his princess, but he knew that it would forever change their relationship. That was not what they needed. The list was the beginning of the end. She wanted the boy the change and he wasn't ready for that.
Soon after, the girl had been offered to become a slave driver, but at the cost of the boy's job. She didn't know what to do. She was scared that the boy would despise her, but the girl felt that she needed a change to make her happy (something the boy wasn't doing for her). The boy expressed his opinion, but wanted the best for her so he let her choose. To the boy that had it perfect, getting to see each other many days. The increased status meant that they could not see each other as much and so the boy quit in order to give her the opportunities she sought. The boy felt bitterness welt up in his heart. Why did the girl screw up something so perfect? After some time that bitterness left, but the hours of time that was now spent apart caused the crack, left by the heartache from the list to shatter the bond between them.
But the boy wanted to rekindle the fire and promised that if the girl gave him six months that he could be everything that his princess deserved. Unfortunately, she gave up after two months and left the broken hearted boy claiming they needed a "break". The boy couldn't let the hurt cause him to be sad. His friend was leaving and he had to be strong for him. After his friend left, the boy was forced to go back to his parent's house. To him it felt as though nothing had changed. He had lost the love of his life and a dear friend. He had no job and now relied on his estranged parents once again.
Soon the sadness set in and the boy could not go a day without missing his princess. After a few months, the girl had grown and come back to the boy. They went on a walk by a river where the boy told the girl of his new found hopes and dreams. The girl believed that the boy had grown as well and asked him to get back together. Still desperately in love, the boy agreed and once again they were happy. Or so it seemed...  After just a few short weeks, it was found that the boy had not grown in the ways that the girl had wanted. The boy seemed to refuse to come back into her life. After the couple went and saw a movie, she had asked the boy to a party, but the boy had a friend in desperate need and refused so that he could aid his friend. Little did the boy know that the girl was also in need. Having been neglected one last time, the girl decided to once again break the heart that she had ran back to.
The boy's heart couldn't mend fast enough this time. It has remained shattered ever since that day. He feels no need to spend time with others and knows that his heart (no matter how broken) remains with his beautiful maiden. The boy had hope though. Hope that he could grow for her and that she would take the boy back one day. After some fun moments the boy thought he truly had a chance once again, but then the girl left on a vacation.

Suddenly, every communication with the girl stopped and the boy was once again left a lone. A few weeks went by and the boy (having listened to an inspiring song) said the words that were hauled up in his mind. "Is there still a chance that we can be together?" "I don't see any potential for us" was the reply.
The last ray of hope fled from the boy's sight that day.
After, the boy still tried every once in a while to have even slight communication with the girl. But he got a reply that truly wasn't the girl's voice. She had a new boy, a new love and she had for a while. The boy was devastated... but responded in his normal calm and patient attitude wishing the girl happiness. Afterwords, the boy realized he needed some closure and again contacted the girl. She told the boy that she needed a bit to regain her composure and that her new love had just broken her heart.
The boy and girl talked. Discussing what had happened. Hope once again returned to the boy, but it was not strong enough to destroy the wall that had been built. The girl returned to the boys side as his friend. She still has lingering feelings for her other love, but the boy listens. He hopes that maybe someday she'll truly understand what his heart has continued to whisper even in it's crushed, dust-like state.
"She's the one... She is home... Wait for her... Love her..."
The boys waits patiently for the girl.
The girl comes back
They live happily ever after
That is my hope; my dream. 


Saturday, November 7, 2009

Nightmare

So last night I had this terrible nightmare... I did not sleep well at all.
 It was new years eve and there was this huge party going on at my old elementary school. Everyone was outside and there was tons of people. The night was lit up with constant fireworks. I was searching for my friend, but I couldn't find him. I ran into most all the girls I've ever liked or been in a relationship with though. They all yelled at me...screaming about all the things that I did wrong... I ran. I finally found my friend. And he was fighting with another friend, like actually throwing punches! So as those two were about to smack each other again I grabbed both of them by the arms they were punching with. Then suddenly I'm in an auditorium. Just standing in the back. There are random people who are just getting up from their seat and walking around the isles telling jokes. All attention was on the person who was up. The  guy told such a crappy joke. But a girl named Carissa stands up and is like "Dude! You're totally telling the joke in the wrong way!" so she gets up and tells the same joke, but it was way funny! I again see my friend I was searching for on the right side of the auditorium and go to sit by him. He has like 20 papers in his hand and he's writing grades on the papers. I look over and they're friend evaluations. He was writing on one with my name on it and I got really crappy scores and failed the evaluation. I walk out of the auditorium back to the outside and everyone starts laughing and calling me terrible things. So I'm running again trying to escape, but then the laughter catches up and I'm pulled into a dark pit. I'm now in a random house. I'm still feeling the hurt. I'm alone...my greatest fear realized... No one cares for my existence...the laughing is still stuck in my head. I run upstairs in this house to what seemed like my room. There's a giant, floor length, window. I'm watching the night sky as the fireworks continue to explode. I look and can see the school from this window too (the room was like 500ft off the ground). I see all the people laughing and having a good time. My friend is among them along with all the people I call friends. I'm filled with anger and sadness. Suddenly there's a voice,  it says "No one is there for you. You've been betrayed. Abandoned. They all think you're nothing! They just chucked you to the side like you're no better than shit. They don't care. No one cares. You're alone. You always will be alone." I can't take it...the voice is overpowering. I place my hand to the window. The seconds are counting down till the new year. The fireworks are creating numbers in the sky. I here the voices of everyone as they count down. 10...9...I hate their voices...8...7...6...I'm alone...5...4...3...I know what's going to happen...2...1...I jump through the window. Falling to my doom my mind is filled with the laughter, the failed evaluation, everything I did wrong...the clock hits 12:00 as I hit the ground...

I woke up in a sweat and was scared out of my mind. That voice...It's still rings in my head... But I'm lucky. Because I know that those friends will absolutely never betray me like that! I know that they care enough. And they are the people that mean the most to me in this world...This will never happen!